I decided to dedicate an entire page to this subject because I realized a need. I am not a professional, and do not claim to know everything about parenting. We still learn every day along with our children. I finally came across a wonderful counselor who showed me the error of my ways. My husband and I needed to change our skills as parents.
"Your Past Should not reflect your Parenting Skills!"
The old way is not necessarily the good way. This is a huge misconception and where we go wrong in society. We base our parenting on how we were raised and most of the time that was even wrong. This cycle either continues or else we raise our children the polar opposite as we were. For myself, I was abused as a child and was not raised with love. Therefore I made sure that when I had my child I would not REPEAT the cycle. I was wrong because I overly compensated and was starting to spoil my son. I love him more than anything but I was creating a monster. I allowed him to get away with everything and not face consequences for his actions......WRONG!
As with anything, I take personal responsibility for my actions. I am so glad that I discovered the truth and know now how to better parent with boundaries, discipline and much love. My husband on the other hand had a different perspective on parenting because of his past. It was wrong repeating the cycles of his past as well. His past as a child was the old way of spankings, switches and in my opinion beatings... I believe in discipline but not abuse.
My husband was starting to pass this on and we decided to come to the realization that our parenting skills needed help. I couldn't believe that I too was parenting badly. The difference is in knowing that we accepted it and wanted to change. We were very different from our parents, but yet we were parenting just like them.
Our children do not come with handbooks. They do not have classes on proper parenting in school, although they should. You are on your own and if you do not have the parenting skills you need, then you go off of what you know from your past. This may not apply to everyone but there certainly is a need for this subject. my parenting skills were all wrong and I didn't even realize it.
"Parents, you are the example............."
In other words, you are your children. Your children are you. Your children are going to adapt and learn from what they see. That is why you must be the example for them. You must be selfless and really decide the parenting skills your children should live and see in the household.
For example your children are sponges. They absorb what they are seeing. There are a few key factors that are important to what your children should be exposed to.
I have briefly touched on this subject. Please look into this matter farther. You may think your parenting skills are fine. They may just be. However, our kids are worth the best. Thanks for reading and I hope I have help shed some light on this topic.
Child Support America
This website is a great place for information on child support. There is a page dedicated to every states guidelines. A visitor will learn various resources to meet their needs. We offer tips on establishing paternity, modifications, and much more.
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