I am not a doctor or an expert in toddler behavior. I am only a mother who is willing to educate and pass on my personal tips and advice. You must seek the advice of your pediatrician for medical opinions.
The Time out discipline method really worked for our toddler. It is an alternative to spanking and can be very effective if used properly. You can start them out as early as 18 months. That way they learn to understand what exactly "time out" means. As time goes on and more discipline is needed, longer periods of punishment should be given. The more they are repeatedly placed in time out for doing something, the more they will learn that it is something they shouldn't do. It may take time before a toddler gets the idea but they do get the idea in the long run. Here are some rules that our family used and found effective. "Time Out" Rules
- Pick the right place. It can be a Chair, or the corner. You can use a step and call it "the naughty step". Whatever method you choose stay with it. Be consistent and use that item or place for punishment times only.
- Use an age appropriate time length for the time-out. Approximately one minute per year of age is reasonable; that time may be doubled if necessary if the child pushes their limits during their punishment.
- A portable kitchen timer or the clock on the stove can be set for the required time. When the alarm goes off, go to your toddler and tell him he can get up. Then, wipe the slate clean. Do not remind him what he did wrong.
- There is no limit on how many times you can use this method in a 24-hour period. Toddler behavior can get bad sometimes. Your child will test you, so be prepared. If they keep doing the same behaviors keep using time out. They will finally understand that the behavior is unacceptable.
- In order for "time out" to be effective, there can be no warnings or second chances. Never threaten your child by saying "if you don't stop hitting you are going into the naughty chair." WRONG!! Just put them in.
- Use IMMEDIATELY!!!It is more effective when used promptly after the child misbehaves. This keeps the bad toddler behavior from escalating. Using time out immediately also keeps a parent from becoming too angry. The child gains control when the parent loses control!
- Be sure your child stays in for the full time. Some toddlers initially may need to be held in the chair, so do not be discouraged. Do not let your toddler decide when their time is over. Parents stay in control of the situation at all times.
- Don't worry if your child is not quiet while being punished. Ignore the tantrums, noise making, complaining, or begging. Just because a child is not quiet during their punishment doesn't mean it's not working . One of the secrets of this method being successful is ignoring the child all together. That means no eye contact, no conversation and definitely not being in the same room.
"Time Out" for the Parents It can be just as upsetting for us when our toddler is having such a tantrum and is upset it can be bad for both parties. So relax and give yourself a breather while your toddler is having one. Just take some deep breaths and calm down. Remember that your child gains control when you lose control. My husband and I just try to take the approach to just enjoy our son. Even during this defiant toddler behavior stage. From tantrums to kicking and even when you have to discipline during time out. Just look at it like Today they are two years old but, tomorrow when you wake up they are going to be 16. So enjoy them, during every stage of their little lives.
|
|
